I have decided that my resolution in 2012 is to never refuse my husband's sexual advances. We have been married for more than 20 years and are both in our 40's. We already have a good sex life as my husband gets quite cranky if he isn't getting it on a regular basis but I am wondering what impact never refusing him will have on our marriage, our health and our general outlook on life.
As I mentioned, he's already getting it on a fairly regular basis - but less than 36 hours into 2012 he would have been shot down once already this year. I said yes this morning with 3 of our 4 children awake and about. Normally I would have said "NO WAY - the kids are awake" - but we managed it. As I showered afterwards I figured out that 36 hours into 2012 we had already had sex 3 times - so our 2012 average was off to a pretty good start.
Now - my husband does not know about my resolution. I think I would be asking for trouble if I let him in on it - I'm sure it would lead to some 'I dare you' situations. I figure I will keep this blog and track our progress for the year and then share the blog with him in 2013.
If I look at this as an experiment here are my hypotheses (I had to google the plural form of hypothesis so this resolution has already resulted in an improved vocabulary!):
>> We will be more affectionate in our daily lives
>> My husband will be in a much better mood all the time
>> We will sleep better
>> We will lose weight.
>> We will be healthier
>> We will have more energy
I really hope that this resolution will prove my hypotheses right and have some additional perks as well!
Stay tuned!
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asking a personal question on such a blog seems very appropriate. my wife and i's relationship seems pretty similar to yours. like your husband, i want it all the time. i don't always ask for it but can't stand the rejection when i am turnded down.
ReplyDeletemy question is, would it upset you more if your husband pouted or got upset at rejection or just masturbated without asking?
The pout makes me feel guilty. If he gets upset I get angry. Masturbation would actually make me feel better - off the hook. In our 21 years I have never had any indication that he was masturbating on the side (except when he was deployed when he was in the military). I don't think I the old me would have minded. The new me would probably not be happy as I would rather we find a group activity to enjoy. Having said that, I rarely outright rejected him prior to this resolution, and when I did I would tell him tomorrow (and mean it). On the other hand I often gave out 'not open for business' clues that I realize now still led to him feeling rejected and resulted in a slow down in our sex life in general.
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to say that this blog is beautiful. Your simple and sweet, down to earth desire to make your marriage the best it can be is truly uplifting. I read a whole lot of blogs, and this is one of the very few times I have ever read the entire thing.
ReplyDeleteIt is quite inspiring and edifying to see love in action, and from so personal a perspective. God bless you and your family, and keep up the good work. I already can't wait to here you husband's response to this monumental work, and I hope you share it with us when the time comes.
Thanks Dance - glad you found me and I really appreciate the encouragement!
DeleteI think all of those hypotheses will come to pass, including more energy and losing weight. This is my first read after DEC 3 post. Already like your style, escpecially the google comment. My wife will call me from her work for correct spellings from time to time and I tell her to just start typing into the google box and it will "spell" it for you if you are close.
ReplyDeleteUserdand