Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Hi there

So I fell off the face of the blog earth for a while.  I just didn't have the pull that I had when this was my little secret blog.

I did miss the updates, the updates from others and the interaction - but the longer I was away the odder it felt to come back.

Life is good - work is kicking my ass.  Just celebrated 10 years since last chemo and still healthy.  Still love my husband - still saying yes!

Kids are good.  Son is going to graduate college in 3 years - with a 3.9.  Daughter is finishing up her senior year in style and having a great lacrosse season.  Little boys keep me moving and continue to grow so I won't be able to call them the little boys much longer.

I'm glad you all were still checking on me.  I will try to post once a week and I promise that post from my husband with his reaction - even if I have to bribe him with sexual favors!

Monday, January 14, 2013

I know you are waiting

I know you are waiting for the reaction from Mr. Yes.  I promise this week.  Hopefully he will have time tonight and tomorrow night for some more reading and reflection.

Random snipits of what is going on :

Last week was another busy one for us.  The oldest headed off to college out of state.  His first class starts in 30 minutes - very exciting and very sad all the same.  He is 19 and is really living like an adult for the first time which is so cool.  But at the same time he will never be part of the family in the same way again.  I am excited for what his future holds and for getting to know the adult in him.  Our daughter was in the school's one act play performance Friday and Saturday - we are still struggling to get all the stage make up off.  She was a pink pig and there is still a distinct pink to her cheeks. 

Guess what I did - I finished a bj with a happy ending!  I know pretty cool.  Things have been pretty adventurous in the bedroom so I had the benefit of him being thoroughly warmed up before I started and that may be the key.  So moving forward as I work on this the key seems to be not to start specifically with that.

Just to make this post totally all over the place I will share that my two football teams did not do well this week.  Notre Dame is my college team - I didn't attend but my parents met and married there and I was raised on ND football.  The Bronco's are my team by marriage and they totally blew it against Baltimore.  Thank goodness hockey is back.  I just got the schedule yesterday and can't wait to see my Capitals take the ice!!!

On another side note - my Christmas decorations are still out.  With the unexpected hospitals stays, support calls for work, kids headed out to college, basketball, wrestling, my daughters play and football there just hasn't been in any time.  I am capped on vacation at work - I have 4 weeks on the books and won't earn any more until I use some so I think I will take Thursday, Friday and Monday off to get everything put away.

And finally - I haven't had to use my inhaler in 5 days.  So today I will start exercising.  I am less than 4 months from my next half marathon and about 10 pounds from my target weight.  I think I will do a mix of P90X and running with a little dance thrown in there.  






Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Just had a good idea!

So I thought this might be fun.  Let's interview Mr. Yes.  I can come up with questions - but if there are some you guys want to contribute I think that would be a lot of fun.

I imagine it would be hard to respond to a year's worth of posts especially on a private subject.

Direct questions might be easier.

So bring it - can be related to a specific post, or comment, or anything else (sports, chickens - whatever you want).  He will answer what he wants to and ignore those that he isn't comfortable with.

You can leave a comment here with your question or you can send it to email if you want.

My email is dontsayno2012@gmail.com.

So tell us what you absolutely need to know!

Monday, January 7, 2013

2013 off to an interesting start.

A quick update on the reading of the blog and reaction from my husband.   He has been back to the blog - which surprised me because I didn't think he would be able to find it.  Apparently he googled 'Mrs. Yes' and was able to find the blog from my profile.  So I was happy that he had made that effort on his own.   He absolutely can't believe that I have 'followers' or that there are so many hits.  He is astounded that people actually are interested in this and follow along.  No negative reactions at all!

There is a very subtle shift in the relationship and daily interaction.  I feel like for me now that he is reading my thoughts of the last year it is easier and more comfortable to initiate.  At the same time I can feel a difference in the way that he is initiating.  Will wait a while longer to explore that as a blog entry.

This process of the reveal and reactions is slower than I thought due to the other things going on in life.

Our oldest had a scheduled surgery on Friday, a tonsillectomy.  We were prepared for that, what we weren't prepared for was his girlfriend to be admitted to the hospital.  Her mom is out of town and she was too sick to be left alone.  We were in urgent care and ER all day on Thursday.  Then right after outpatient surgery on Friday, we were back again - this time she was admitted and stayed until Sunday afternoon.  My son stayed with her, and I ran back and forth as he couldn't drive on his pain medication.

Today they are both resting comfortably and I am trying to get them healthy enough to head off to college out of state for classes that start next Monday!



Wednesday, January 2, 2013

So he is reading

Well - my reveal was a bit later than expected.  I had to support a client as they had issues with their year end processing and I was on a call with them from 3:30 until 10:30 yesterday.

So he only had time to read January and part of February.  So far no negative reaction but no comments either.

Tonight he hasn't had a chance to read any because I am working on my computer and he and the 19 year old are doing two separate fantasy drafts on the other laptop.  He can't read between picks because this is not something I am ready to share with my son.

So it may be the weekend before he gets a chance to do some more reading.


Tuesday, January 1, 2013

So how did it go?

It has been a year of 'Yes' in my house.  A year where I never rejected my husband because I was tired, or cranky, or annoyed with him, or just not feeling it.  So a brief recap against my originally hypotheses:
:
>> We will be more affectionate in our daily lives

Yes.  We have always been affectionate - although not in the normal ways.  We have never been the type to end a call with "I love you" or leave for work with a kiss.  Our affection is usually shown by holding hands, sitting together and having some physical contact.  A hug or squeeze as we cook dinner or go about our lives.  I do think that we are more affectionate and I think where I see this the most is actually in bed - but not during sex.  We snuggle up more as we settle in for the night, after sex and just while we sleep.  While we have always held hands out and about - he now reaches for my hand pretty immediately as we get out of the car these days.

>> My husband will be in a much better mood all the time

This is a little harder to gauge because I don't think I looked for this one specifically.  I can say that the moodiness that was apparent during dry spells in previous years did not rear its head this year.  So I guess I can say that I noticed the lack of bad mood more than I noticed him being generally in a better mood.  I think this is like appreciating your good health only when you are sick.

>> We will sleep better

So this one is a yes but it comes with a big BUT.  So for me I am sleeping better - but I am sleeping less.  So there is a trade off here.  While my sleep is deeper and more satisfying, there is less of it so in general I didn't make any big improvements.

>> We will lose weight.

I lost 10 pounds over the year.  I did make slight modifications to the way I eat so this can't all be attributed to the change in my sex life.  I do think that my increased awareness of my sex drive has helped me stay on track for my fitness and weight goals.  10 pounds probably doesn't seem like much, and I still have 10 to go to be where I think I should be, but it is significant because my metabolism shit the bed a few years ago and I gained about 20 pounds.  Those pounds have been very hard to shed even with extensive exercise.

>> We will be healthier

Nope, my husbands joints are falling apart and my breathing issues are worse than ever.

>> We will have more energy

I will say we have more sexual energy, not sure that has filtered into any other aspects of our lives.


Additional info:

>> I am so much more aware of my sex drive.  It was always there but I think I choose to ignore it.  Now that I am paying attention it is so easy to always say YES and mean it.
>> Sex is better.  We still have boring married sex, but more often we have really great sex.


I could go on and on here - but I won't.  I am going to create a blogger id for my husband and hand over the computer.  Hopefully he will tell us:

>> Did you notice anything different this year?  How long did it take for you to notice this change?
>> What is your overall reaction to the blog - are you embarrassed, mad, annoyed, ambivalent, turned on?
>> Any ideas for a resolution for 2013?


Monday, December 31, 2012

You aren't going to believe this

Last night at 1:30 am - so technically this was December 31, 2012,  I woke up with a pounding sinus headache.  It was behind my left eye and it was the type of pressure that seems to shift when you move your head.  At 1:45 my husband rolled over and started to make some moves on me.  I had to do it - I had to respectfully decline his advances.  I just told him that I had some terrible sinus pressure and asked if he could hold off for a few hours.  He was fine with that.

I didn't feel any guilt, didn't feel like I rejected him, but saw the irony of having to break my resolution on the last day.  I think I would have cried if I tried to suck it up and go for it.

In any case I am cashing in my one get out of jail free card and calling this resolution a massive success.

Tomorrow I will hand the computer over to my husband - direct him to the blog and let him at it!  I think I may even create a user id for him so that he can comment if he wants - and I do hope he wants to.  I am curious to see his take on the past year, whether he noticed any changes, does he feel the need to defend himself when I have called him out for things out here where he had no way to stand up for himself, does he have any other feedback that I missed.

Before I do all of that I will do a 'wrap up' post on the good the bad and the ugly of the year 2012!

Hope you have a safe and happy New Year's Eve celebration!

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