Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Is all this analysis good for me????
I struggle with this post a bit - hope you don't judge me. I think I am harder on myself and will probably sound bad as I post this. I really am very good to my husband but - I did have another huge 'AHA' moment this morning.
A little background info - one of my biggest pet peeves is when my husband and I are watching tv together in bed and he decided it is time for bed and he turns the tv off without asking if I am done watching. I just want him to ask - geez it isn't that hard. I have had this conversation with him more times than I can count - he just doesn't get it. I do understand that this is my issue -but I hate not being asked, it is like going to the kitchen without asking if the other person wants anything it is just rude.
So of course this happened last night - and the normal me - would have shut down right away. Here is where I get a pat on the head - I didn't shut down. I told myself - he didn't do it to be rude - he did it because he wants to have some undistracted alone time with me. And I was able to forget the incident and relax. So all is good there.
Now this morning is when I realized something that made me feel like crap. The old me would have turned my back - literally to him and shut down completely. I would have put up a wall because he had annoyed me. He took the control away from my ability to watch tv and decide when I was done - so I would take the control of our sex life. I really don't like the way that sounds.
I can also turn it around and say he took control of our sex life by not acknowledging me and asking if I was ready for bed. Argh - so I have hit "over analysis" here.
I am going to celebrate the small steps I am taking. I am going to continue to look at my behavior - and his - to see where we are putting up roadblocks. Still having fun here ...
Shout out to the Caps tonight - hope they can bounce back and beat the Pens!
at 8:20 AM