Tuesday, April 24, 2012

A spike in the drive

Not sure why, and really who cares, my sex drive was a little higher yesterday.  I think it is because with so much rain the past 3 days all of our activities were cancelled and we weren't running in 7 different directions.  I had a productive day at work, my oldest took care of his sick little brother, all baseball and lacrosse was cancelled, my husband made and cleaned up dinner.

We went to bed together with no intention of going to sleep.

It is nice to have a few weather induced days off to get back to important indoor activities.

So about last night - I was not in the mood for lazy sex, and I spoke up.  See there are certain positions that just feel lazy to me.  They feel like "I am here and I want to have sex, but I really don't want to put any effort into it".  These positions just don't do it for me for two reasons, the first I already stated, it doesn't seem to me that my husband is really into the act, this is probably 100% not true but it is what is going through my mind.  Second, they just don't hit the right spots for me.  So last night as we got into bed he was ready for lazy sex and I told him nope.  I don't want that position it really doesn't do it for me.  So I am scoring one for me on the speaking up - normally I would have just been disappointed about the choice of position.

For those of you out there shaking your heads at me because I am at 42 just speaking up realize that  I am making efforts here - so stop shaking your head and don't judge me. I am not 'all' women, I am me.  I am a woman who was raised very catholic, who lost her mother before puberty and who is finally finding her voice sexually.  I have never been a prude, I just have always let my husband lead and have always been shy about my needs and desires.  I do realize how lucky I am to have a husband that has always considered my needs and desires even if they aren't voiced.



  1. I'm shaking my head but it is because I wish there were more women like you. I'm around so many women who in my opinion act childish about sex, can't talk about it , need to have a room so dark that you cant see them , its just stupid. Did I mention I was shaking my head up and down and mumbling you go girl!

  2. I recently discovered your blog and kudos to you for taking your sexual pleasure into your hands. I, too am from a very religious background and although young have had trouble being a sex initiator. This was part of the reasons my engagement ended and I've had issues in other relationships. This has encouraged me to find that voice.

    1. Glad you found me, hope that my blog helps you in some way. I appreciate any comments and feedback you have.

  3. @Dave. Preaching to the choir, brother. I wonder if sometimes the light actually is low so she doesn't have to be visually punished by my ancient body.