So as I learned yesterday from a reader of this blog - yesterday was 'National Steak and Blow Job Day'. We had pork chops and mashed potatoes for dinner - so we missed the mark on that one. We did however complete the bj part of the day.
I informed my husband of the holiday at around 7:30 and he then had to patiently wait until 11:30. As for my research - I did suffer some sort of reaction - I toughed it out as long as I could, apologized and then finished up. I told my husband that for him we might need to rename the day 'National Sucky Blow Job Day'. He will take what he can get and there was no complaining last night.
As for his diet - over the past 24 hours. Turkey, Pork, Eggs, Coffee, Black Olives. Pain went away almost instantly, and wasn't as intense as it was in the past.
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Thursday, March 15, 2012
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Oops
So I had planned a little oral experimentation for last night and then I went and fell asleep. All was not lost as my husband managed to wake me up and ask if I was "RTF" - he screwed it up but we figured 'ready' worked possibly better than 'down' in our case anyway.
We had a good time and I was able to go immediately back to sleep. This has been one of the issues in the past - if I am asleep and wake up for sex it is hard for me to get back to sleep. That was one of the reasons that I would ask my husband if we could do it in the morning instead of at night. It was so frustrating to be asleep - be woken up and then listen to him snore as I lay awake after.
Last night my husband is the one that had trouble falling asleep - I was out right away and he was eating a snack and watching tv.
Tonight I will try to stay awake and start things off with some oral...
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We had a good time and I was able to go immediately back to sleep. This has been one of the issues in the past - if I am asleep and wake up for sex it is hard for me to get back to sleep. That was one of the reasons that I would ask my husband if we could do it in the morning instead of at night. It was so frustrating to be asleep - be woken up and then listen to him snore as I lay awake after.
Last night my husband is the one that had trouble falling asleep - I was out right away and he was eating a snack and watching tv.
Tonight I will try to stay awake and start things off with some oral...
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Monday, March 12, 2012
Young minds
We were driving home from my brother's house and my 9 year old says "Mom, life is a lot like driving - if you look back and not forward you are probably going to crash". Love that he has things like that floating around in that fabulous brain of his.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Beautiful Sunday
Gorgeous day - and the house is almost clean!
I was able to forget about the mess last night and relax. I enjoyed a very fattening dessert that my husband brought home for me! He also unfortunately brought home some very nasty bad breath that had me literally hiding behind one of my pillows. Last nights sexually positions were dictated by my efforts to avoid being directly exposed to his jambalaya induced bad breath. Luckily we have been married long enough for me to be able to say - I love you and I want to do this - but your breath is toxic so get creative and keep it away from me!
Now for me - if he would say this to me I would be mortified - but all is good with him. No amount of mouthwash was helping and he wasn't going to let it slow him down at all.
Tonight I am going to try to spice it up a bit. Clean sheets on the bed and a clean house can really get me in the mood!
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I was able to forget about the mess last night and relax. I enjoyed a very fattening dessert that my husband brought home for me! He also unfortunately brought home some very nasty bad breath that had me literally hiding behind one of my pillows. Last nights sexually positions were dictated by my efforts to avoid being directly exposed to his jambalaya induced bad breath. Luckily we have been married long enough for me to be able to say - I love you and I want to do this - but your breath is toxic so get creative and keep it away from me!
Now for me - if he would say this to me I would be mortified - but all is good with him. No amount of mouthwash was helping and he wasn't going to let it slow him down at all.
Tonight I am going to try to spice it up a bit. Clean sheets on the bed and a clean house can really get me in the mood!
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Saturday, March 10, 2012
Focus
Another busy day today - ran the concessions at a lacrosse tournament for my daughters HS. She didn't get to play as she was busy taking her SAT. Missed the little guys playing basketball. Went home with 25 left over Chick Fil A Sandwiches and 2 dozen donuts.
The house is a disaster - i'm sitting in the kitchen right now and there isn't an inch of counter space - dishes everywhere - half played game of life on the table. Coolers line the dining room - waiting to be cleaned and put away. Dog puked downstairs. No beds are made.
Normally I would be bugging out over this - but I am too tired to care. I have nothing to do until tomorrow so I am going to put on some blinders and ignore it. The plan is to wake up tomorrow and CLEAN!
My husband is out with his friends from graduate school - all women. I am going to get a glass of wine and going to watch a movie with the little kids. Then off to bed with them. I will be ready, willing and able when my husband rolls in!
I'm liking this plan (but would like it way better if the cleaning fairy would make a visit tonight)!
The house is a disaster - i'm sitting in the kitchen right now and there isn't an inch of counter space - dishes everywhere - half played game of life on the table. Coolers line the dining room - waiting to be cleaned and put away. Dog puked downstairs. No beds are made.
Normally I would be bugging out over this - but I am too tired to care. I have nothing to do until tomorrow so I am going to put on some blinders and ignore it. The plan is to wake up tomorrow and CLEAN!
My husband is out with his friends from graduate school - all women. I am going to get a glass of wine and going to watch a movie with the little kids. Then off to bed with them. I will be ready, willing and able when my husband rolls in!
I'm liking this plan (but would like it way better if the cleaning fairy would make a visit tonight)!
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Time for an Escape
Spring break is coming up and it might be a good time for a night away, with no kids! Two years ago I left a hotel key and a map in my husbands car. I think it might be time for a repeat of that - or something more creative this time. Does that count as initiating???
I was also thinking of spicing things up a little this month. I will initiate at least once a week. I will initiate at least once at a totally unexpected time. I will work some more oral into the picture.
The other day my husband made the comment that the ratio was 25:1 in his favor for giving oral. I would tend to think it is actually much more lopsided than that. I have never refused when asked but geez it must be so frustrating for him to have to ask.
There are specific reasons (excuses) why this is not part of our regular routine. First, I actually think I am allergic to him. I know that sounds bizarre and I am not sure if it is just me. I have a ton of food allergies (corn, soy, pork, milk, peanuts, the list goes on and on). I am able to still eat these things because I have a nifty symptom that lets me know that my allergies are kicking in. My palate gets sore and it actually hurts to eat. If I stop eating and wash out my mouth the pain usually goes away after about 10 minutes. At times the pain is very intense. Well same thing happens with my husband - it is very bizarre. Second, I don't think I am very good at it. Practice makes perfect - but then see point 1 - it is actually quite painful for me.
I am going to start adding this in - even if it is just for a short spurts and doesn't lead to oral happy ending.
I was also thinking of spicing things up a little this month. I will initiate at least once a week. I will initiate at least once at a totally unexpected time. I will work some more oral into the picture.
The other day my husband made the comment that the ratio was 25:1 in his favor for giving oral. I would tend to think it is actually much more lopsided than that. I have never refused when asked but geez it must be so frustrating for him to have to ask.
There are specific reasons (excuses) why this is not part of our regular routine. First, I actually think I am allergic to him. I know that sounds bizarre and I am not sure if it is just me. I have a ton of food allergies (corn, soy, pork, milk, peanuts, the list goes on and on). I am able to still eat these things because I have a nifty symptom that lets me know that my allergies are kicking in. My palate gets sore and it actually hurts to eat. If I stop eating and wash out my mouth the pain usually goes away after about 10 minutes. At times the pain is very intense. Well same thing happens with my husband - it is very bizarre. Second, I don't think I am very good at it. Practice makes perfect - but then see point 1 - it is actually quite painful for me.
I am going to start adding this in - even if it is just for a short spurts and doesn't lead to oral happy ending.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Check Point
As March begins I am happy to report that the initial resolution is going strong. I have been paying attention to things and am happy to report that not only have I kept the resolution, I am at the point were I don't want to refuse any advances. That is big - because it means that I'm not just having sex with my husband because I said I would never say no. I am at a point where I crave the intimacy and look forward to it every day.
Now that doesn't mean that there aren't times when I really crave sleep. The resolution is a reminder that as much as I need sleep, I can and should do both. AND there are times where my husband recognizes my need for sleep and will instead catch me the next morning when I am fully rested. Even though he doesn't know about my resolution he has been along for the ride and is definitely adjusting to the new norm in our sex life. The whenever you want it attitude seems to have him more in tune to my needs as well as his.
So statistically over the first 2 months - we have had sex on 52% of the days. In February I noticed a slow down in my drive, that is not to say I didn't have any drive, It just wasn't the all consuming drive that I was feeling a few weeks ago.
I have also struggled on 3 occasions with being annoyed or angry with my husband to the point that I really had no desire and it would have been difficult to keep the resolution. Here is how I am handling that. I am using the 'never go to bed angry' policy. I can't withhold sex to punish him because he made me angry - even if I am right. Building this stronger relationship has to happen in and out of bed and we have to be able to fight and make up constructively.
We went wine tasting with friends last night - and enjoyed some good conversation with our oldest when we got home. It was a great night that ended with me falling asleep. I am well rested and looking forward to catching up with him at some point today.
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